Why You Keep Snapping, Even When You “Know Better”

🎧 Based on Episode 9 of Root to Ring: A Resilient Parenting Podcast

If you’ve ever walked away from a moment with your teen and thought:

“I should’ve handled that better.”
“Why do I keep snapping?”
“I know what to do, but I just can’t seem to do it.”

This episode is for you.

Let’s be honest, so many moms are living in a constant state of emotional overload. And when you’re in survival mode, even the best intentions can go out the window. You’re not a bad parent. You’re a human whose nervous system is asking for support.

Mindset Isn’t Enough—You Need Regulation

You’ve read the parenting books. You’ve listened to the podcasts.
You know what conscious parenting is supposed to look like.

But when your teen rolls their eyes, slams the door, or shuts you out, your brain doesn’t pull up that gentle response. It sends out a distress signal.

Because in that moment, your body isn’t safe. It’s reactive.
And no mindset shift can override a nervous system in fight-or-flight.

Here’s What’s Actually Happening

Every time your teen’s behavior feels threatening (even subtly), your body is scanning for danger. If you’ve been carrying chronic stress, trauma, or emotional exhaustion, your system is already on high alert.

This is why you keep reacting, even when you “know better.”
Because the root isn’t in your mindset. It’s in your body.

The fix isn’t more self-blame.
The fix is more safety—in your body, in your home, and in your parenting rhythm.

3 Gentle Practices to Help You Regulate

If you’re ready to start shifting out of survival mode, try this:

•  Check in with your body: What do you feel, physically, when you’re triggered? Where does it live in your body?
  • Create micro-moments of safety: A hand on your heart. A slow exhale. A walk outside. These are interventions, not indulgences.
  • Repair gently—without shame: It’s not too late. Try: “I noticed I snapped earlier. That’s not the parent I want to be. Let me try again.”

These aren’t quick fixes, but they are powerful shifts.
And they model emotional responsibility in a way your teen can actually feel.

The Rooted Shift: From Reaction to Regulation

In my coaching and community, I guide moms through what I call The Rooted Shift, moving from reactive parenting to nervous system-informed leadership at home.

That looks like:

• Recognizing your own stress patterns
• Creating space before reacting
• Learning to pause before the spiral
• Regulating your body, so you can co-regulate theirs

You don’t need more parenting hacks. You need more healing.

🎧 Prefer to Listen?

Press play below to hear this episode on the podcast.

Episode Title: Why You Keep Snapping, Even When You “Know Better”

Available on Spotify and Apple Podcasts.

Want Help Shifting from Survival to Safety?

If this message resonated, The Rooted Parenting Circle was made for you.

This is a monthly membership community for moms breaking cycles with intention, not shame. Inside, you’ll get:

• A monthly live Q+A and training
• Gentle tools to help you regulate and reconnect
• Weekly prompts to keep you grounded
• Supportive community of like-hearted moms

Doors open October 28, 2025, but you can join anytime. This space was designed to support your nervous system, your growth, and your family, no matter where you’re starting from.

 Join the Rooted Parenting Circle Here

Or DM me the word CIRCLE on Instagram and I’ll send you more info.

You’re not broken.
You’re becoming.
And your healing is changing more than just your home. It’s changing generations.

—
Abi Brown
Parenting Coach & Host of Root to Ring: A Resilient Parenting Podcast